In a recent session, the client was bitching about a guy she was dating who wasn’t treating her with the consideration, respect and courtesy she thought she should be getting. Her studies of the Law of Attraction and affirmations about self-worth had her believing that she deserved better. He was wealthy and influential and was a total jerk. She also believed that he didn’t deserve all his good fortune.
This led to a lot of tapping about getting what one deserved. She felt she deserved more and better in life. She wasn’t asking for the moon. She just wanted the affection and honesty in her relationship she felt she deserved. She really FELT she deserved it so we tapped on the feeling of deserving.
Feelings of deservedness aren’t necessarily a bad or painful feeling so it wouldn’t have occurred to her to tap on it if I hadn’t asked her to. She started tapping on Even though I feel I deserve more, I deeply and completely accept myself. The set up phrase morphed a lot over the next 15 minutes to include how she felt about the guy who got what she felt he didn’t deserve.
When the session was over, she realized feelings of deservedness have nothing to do with the Law of Attraction. Feelings of deservedness aren’t based on any objective standard. Rating such a feeling is totally capricious in nature. Who’s to say how much you have to feel like you deserve something to get it? Who’s to say feeling like you deserve something will even lead to getting it?
She further realized feeling like she deserved something put distance between her and the object of her desire. If she felt like she deserved something, she hadn’t really internalized the feeling of actually having the object of her desire. Saying she deserved something was like saying she wanted something and any student of LOA knows you never affirm that you want something.
She left the session feeling lighter having lifted the burden of this unworkable belief off her shoulders. As for her budding relationship, she dumped the guy. She knew she didn’t deserve the aggravation.
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A complete understanding of the “Law of Deservedness” would really have helped the author in this particular article.
As I explain in my new book, Manifesting From The Heart deservedness is a dastardly ego trap. You might get what you think you deserve but it’s impossible to prove. Nor does believing in it help your life any. My point was to eliminate the idea that you deserve anything at all.